Episode 149- Three traits I see in riders that attain their targets



ALL riders I’ve talked with expertise dissatisfaction…the fascinating factor is that some preserve going and a few don’t.I see folks quit…and I see individuals who overcome.What’s the distinction?I focus on three traits I’ve seen in riders who consistantly attain their targets. I clarify the tipping level that I see and the way how one can determine these patterns in different areas of your life additionally.
Hello, I’m Stacy Westfall, and I’m right here to show you methods to perceive, get pleasure from, and efficiently prepare your individual horses. On this season of the podcast, I’m going to speak about a few of the frequent challenges I see when educating riders. At this time, I’m speaking about three traits that I see in riders who attain their targets. It’s September, and the tip of the yr for me is getting nearer. What I imply by that’s that the present season and the using season, which for me is set considerably by the climate, actually shift after October. So the form of finish of my goal-oriented using yr is definitely nearer than the tip of the calendar yr. And one factor that I observe when this a part of the yr occurs is that I discover in myself and in others this sort of end-of-the-year push. And for a few of us, meaning present targets and for different folks, it means getting within the using they need to accomplish earlier than the climate adjustments and the footing turns into a problem. The factor that each of those have in frequent is that they really feel like the height of the season, and I observe a distinct power in that than the power that comes with the start of the season or the center of the season. And after I was watching some completely different folks that I used to be teaching and my husband was teaching, it had me reflecting on what I’ve seen over time in watching folks. And the primary working title for this podcast that I had was, “The Barely Dissatisfied Rider.” However as I began itemizing all of the ways in which riders usually really feel dissatisfied, I noticed that the fascinating factor is that the entire riders that I’ve talked with have skilled dissatisfaction. So the factor that’s fascinating isn’t the dissatisfaction, it’s the concept that some folks preserve going they usually obtain their targets and a few folks don’t. Now that received me occupied with what’s the tipping level? As a result of I see individuals who face challenges with their horses. like possibly it’s a coaching subject, or possibly it’s a difficult temperament. My notes on this say that could possibly be the individual or the horse, however both which approach I see individuals who quit and–and after I say that I’m not saying it as a judgment from me, I’m saying that they’re verbally saying, I’m simply not going to do it. I’m simply not ok. It’s completely different than I’ve modified my thoughts, I need to go this course. So after I say I see folks giving up, it’s them saying that they’re selecting to not, however they need they might, variations of that. After which I even have the pleasure of seeing individuals who face challenges after which overcome. And what I need to discover on this podcast is what’s the distinction? And I’m going to attempt to put it into phrases and actions as finest I can in an effort to actually make it one thing measurable in an effort to determine any of those in your self and–and form of use it as a measuring device.
Stacy Westfall: So I made a decision to write down down three traits that I’ve seen in riders who do attain their targets. Primary, they’ve a reasonably good deal with on the massive image and the place they’re now. So what meaning to me is I’ll see riders which have a long run purpose that may be inside one using season, that may be inside a number of years, however they’ve an enormous image concept of the place they’re headed, regardless that they don’t have a precise map of methods to get there. They usually do know the place they’re at proper now, they usually do this plenty of occasions by way of classes and instruction. And that’s how I find yourself seeing plenty of them as a result of they’re coming for teaching from both myself or my husband. And so I seen that these folks are likely to have an enormous image and an correct view of the place they’re now that they have been capable of get by getting assessed by any individual else. Quantity two, they’ve one thing like willpower. In the event that they don’t verbalize it in willpower, it’s one thing very comparable. They’ve a very large purpose why they’re doing it and that’s robust sufficient to see them by way of the difficult occasions. After which quantity three is the tiny little steps, the main points. All of them study to have an appreciation of the tiny little steps, the main points.
Stacy Westfall: Now I’m going to undergo these three once more and in addition discuss form of how I see them after they’re not fairly there. So when persons are–after I–after I speak concerning the large image and the place they’re now–so typically I see folks which are solely centered on the place they’re proper now. In order that they’re not likely placing that into the context of the place they’re headed to. Perhaps it’s one thing tremendous normal like, higher with my horsemanship, however there’s no measurable future purpose. It’s simply centered on like, what is correct now? Now what’s fascinating about that is it looks as if that will be actually helpful, however with out that large image facet of it, when it’s simply the deal with the place they’re proper now, it tends to if I–and I’ve had the flexibility to look at folks for many years–and what occurs generally with these folks is that they’ve a very imprecise final result. As a result of one other strategy to phrase it’s they don’t have a transparent course as a result of that’s plenty of occasions what the larger image provides you. Then the flip facet of this one is that typically I see individuals who have like an enormous image, however they don’t have an correct evaluation of the place they’re proper now. In order that they have like these enormous goals, however they’re not wanting, they’re not slowing down and asking questions on whether or not or not they’re the place they’re now in relation to that. And what occurs is, very apparently, they find yourself with a imprecise final result additionally. In order that’s why I put these collectively. There’s a balancing act with like this large image pondering and the place you at the moment are and going forwards and backwards between these two. With quantity two, or willpower or feeling of one thing like that, that’s much like that, if I see folks that say they need to attain a sure purpose with their horse, in the event that they’re not actual assured in why they need that, in the event that they don’t have an actual strong perception about what that journey may appear to be and–and what they’re going to do when it’s awkward or uncomfortable, then what occurs is that plenty of occasions these folks will change paths. In order that they’ll head down one path after which when issues get powerful, they’ll change paths. After which that path will appear to be it’s working for a short while after which when it will get powerful, they’ll change paths. Now I need to watch out right here as a result of that is the place it’s such an inside job so that you can do the work to grasp this as a result of altering paths could possibly be a part of your journey or it may lead you to set smaller and smaller targets, which may restrict you reaching your full potential. However that is one thing that’s so private to every person that you could be onto your self about whether or not you’re altering paths as a result of issues received powerful. And for those who return to Episode 147 that I titled, This Is the Awkward, Uncomfortable A part of the Journey, there are going to be awkward, uncomfortable components of the journey, and also you want a plan for the way you’re going to barter these moments when issues get powerful, or you may change your path. Simply watch out, as a result of for those who simply preserve altering it to attempt to get that higher feeling, plenty of occasions you’ll find yourself wanting again and being like, oh, I simply saved getting smaller and smaller and smaller targets. And once more, you’re the one which has to measure for those who’re on the trail and whether or not that’s a smaller purpose or an even bigger purpose. And I believe you’re going to grasp that small/large form of comparability factor after I get to quantity three in a minute. As a result of quantity three, that is really the one the place I listed it because the tiny little steps or the main points. To me, the fascinating factor is, for those who stated that I solely was capable of have considered one of these, if I may solely decide one factor, it will be this one as a result of I believe the primary two I simply talked about, the massive image and the place you at the moment are and the willpower or one thing much like that, I believe these are our key. However I additionally assume that individuals, you’ll see folks in these too.
Stacy Westfall: To me, the tipping level is that this third one. It’s this fascination with the tiny little steps, as a result of listed here are two decisions right here with the tiny little steps, all the main points is fascination or frustration. As a result of I see lots of people who get actually annoyed with all of the tiny little steps as a result of plenty of occasions it’ll sound like this: I simply need to know this one factor. However so usually, as somebody who teaches plenty of these abilities that one factor that the individual is itemizing–let’s simply say load the horse on a trailer or, , get my horse to decelerate cantering on the path, I simply need to know this one factor–usually you could study 10 little issues to get higher at that one. And so this to me, if I had one factor to select, this is able to be what I might measure on as a result of typically folks will–they’ll be annoyed that there are such a lot of layers to it. However actually, for those who can study to get fascinated by all the main points, that is how I–I can see individuals who actually make it, as in, they obtain their targets. They’re persistently, , they’re–they’re setting targets, they’re attaining them, they’re setting new ones. They’re completely having moments of frustration, they’re completely nonetheless feeling awkward, and all these different issues that I talked about in that different podcast. However after they see that there’s increasingly more to study, there’s a stage of fascination inside that. I received occupied with this yesterday as a result of the equine therapeutic massage therapist was right here and we have been speaking as she was engaged on the horses. And I stated, I believe it’s so fascinating that after I’m using that I really feel increasingly more element, regardless that I’ve been doing this for a really very long time and I’m an expert. So I’ve been doing it professionally for many years and I believed it was fascinating as a result of she was form of saying the identical factor that, , she’s massaging horses, and there’s only a stage of element you could expertise higher as you’ve carried out extra. So the extra you study, the extra you may see and really feel, after which the extra you may study and it retains snowballing. However typically when persons are centered on simply the larger steps they usually don’t have this fascination with the tiny little steps, then plenty of the element of the subsequent layer after which the subsequent layer after which the subsequent layer, these are form of hidden. And I’ve tried describing this as a result of to me, this comes throughout as a sense plenty of occasions. However I’ve tried describing it and having conversations with particularly lengthy, long run prospects who I’ve been teaching for a very long time as a result of one of many ways in which–that we are able to get laughing about it’s that I’ll be teaching somebody they usually’ve been working and dealing and dealing and dealing, they usually lastly obtain the–this factor that they’ve been engaged on, they usually’re so joyful to lastly obtain it, after which it’s form of like climbing a mountain and it’s like, they’re like, I’m on the peak of the mountain. After which I’ll say like, OK, that is really like base camp. After which the clouds form of, , blow away for a second, and swiftly you may see how far more of the mountain there may be to climb. And so it’s a really fascinating second as a coach as a result of I can see how exhausting they work to get there, how a lot time they’ve put in, how a lot dedication they’ve put in, that they’ve achieved it and it needs to be celebrated, and that it’s a stage of base camp. And have in mind, every of those mountains is particular person and every of those plateaus or spots that you simply cease to relaxation and have a good time are additionally particular person so I’m not evaluating this individual to individual. However what I’m saying is that plenty of occasions if you wish to carry on studying, it’s received slightly little bit of a sense of like climbing that mountain, arriving, after which wanting up and seeing there’s extra. And I believe that’s why, relying on the analogy that you simply use, typically persons are like, this feels prefer it’s all uphill. And I simply used an analogy that makes it sound prefer it’s all uphill. In order that’s why plenty of occasions you’ll hear me saying that it’s like including layers and including particulars. However I’ll inform you this, that after I use the analogy or the considered like that is like including extra layers or including particulars, then there are moments for me that it additionally looks like taking the whole lot aside and fully rebuilding it. And I believe that that’s the place possibly for those who’re like me and you want the thought of including layers and layers that may make it appear safer or possibly much less dramatic than the mountaineering concept. However after I say that, , it form of jogs my memory of–have you ever ever seen–each on occasion after I’m flipping by way of channels or one thing, I’ll see a few of the nice artists and there there’s all this art work in these actually historical church buildings, they usually’ll be doing these detailed cleanings of those superb work they usually’ll uncover various things. They’ll uncover the unique colours, they’ll uncover, , work beneath work and completely different settings, all these various things. So any individual was including layers over time and including element or overlaying up element. After which these persons are getting into and as a part of restoration, they’re–they’re making an attempt to determine what to take aside, what to–what to do, methods to get this again in the most effective form. And to me, that’s like scratching the floor of what I’m speaking about as a result of to me, there’s additionally for–for me, using horses, it’s like this whole rebuild at occasions. And if I inform folks that that is going to be like mountaineering and also you’re going to get to this base and also you’re going to, , calm down there for a short while and have a good time and then you definitely’re going to search for and there’s extra mountain there, like, do I do this endlessly? Nicely, clearly it’s a selection for the way lengthy you go along with it. But it surely’s fascinating as a result of then in my–my world, I’m it as a–as a rebuild and I do that and also you’ve been watching me do that.
Stacy Westfall: In case you’ve been watching or listening to the podcast or movies or no matter for some time is that I’ll take issues and tear them fully aside. And like me taking on dressage undoubtedly had and nonetheless has a component to taking the whole lot aside and rebuilding it. And that’s taking me aside and rebuilding, going approach again to the fundamentals. And after I say approach again to the fundamentals, it signifies that I’m in a Corridor of Fame, within the Cowgirl Corridor of Fame, and I’m asking questions concerning the tack. Like present me methods to put the saddle on. Does the saddle match? Will you double-check my gear? What size–what size dressage girth do you utilize? As a result of I discover some or persons are utilizing longer ones and a few persons are utilizing shorter ones. And I’ve an opinion in my western saddle, however I’m open to listening to the opinions that you simply guys have on this. It’s going all the best way again to, is my tack fitted accurately? Can any individual else give me their opinion? Are my garments fitted accurately? And it goes all the best way again to creating a ton of errors. Errors that aren’t errors in my world of reining like strolling out of the…even–I moved in–slowing down, strolling out of the world, strolling out of using a Western dressage check or conventional dressage check, really, and–and them saying they need to test the bit and me taking the bridle off and all of them panicking. As a result of in that world, you don’t take the bridle off, you retain the bridle on they usually test the bit within the horse’s mouth. However in my world, we take the entire bridle off within the reining world. And so it’s being in public and making these errors. It’s–it’s making mistake after mistake. It’s how having them ring the bell as a result of I made a mistake, after which as I cease and I flip after which I lope over to ask the decide what to do subsequent, after which I’m in hassle for loping since you’re not presupposed to lope after they ring the bell to seek out out what you’re doing. So it’s like stacking mistake after mistake after mistake. And understanding what I talked about in Episode 145 about confidence and 147 about being awkward and uncomfortable. And I believe it’s simply actually fascinating when–after I give it some thought as a result of I like to undergo my life determining the–the life theories that I see working within the horse world, that I additionally see working outdoors of the horse world.
Stacy Westfall: So I like to go searching my very own life and see different locations the place I’m working towards these identical abilities and the rebuild instance to me completely matches one other considered one of my targets that I had for 2021, which was one which I don’t assume I’ve talked about an excessive amount of on the podcast as a result of it’s not tremendous straight associated to horses, however principally a buddy challenged me initially of the yr. I used to be speaking to her about operating a 5K and she or he stated, Why don’t you run a 10k this yr? And I used to be like, What? That’s loopy. Like, like, I’m not even a runner and also you need me to run a 10k? What? And so it’s fascinating to cease and take a look at another items of my life outdoors of the horse world and see what I can study from every place. Can I study one thing from the horse world and convey it to a different a part of my life, which I undoubtedly did after I was working for this purpose? After which additionally like, what am I studying after I’m operating and I’m doing this operating purpose? How is that going to assist me with my using? How can I get this to criss-cross forwards and backwards throughout life? As a result of it’s simply actually fascinating. Tremendous quick story, like rising up, not likely into operating, someplace in round, I don’t know, possibly round 2000, , 2000 or one thing like that. Someplace round there downloaded the sofa to 5K app, dabbled in operating on and off in 2018. I received extra severe about it as a result of I actually wished to enhance my health for using. After which in 2018, I ran three completely different 5ks and thought, wow, that is like the height of my operating profession. After which in 2019, I didn’t run any 5ks. I nonetheless did some operating round residence, however I didn’t really go do any 5ks, don’t actually have any data from that yr a lot. After which 2020, I used to be doing a little and I ran one digital race and, , I used to be simply form of–form of there. And so for those who take a look at that and I–and I need to evaluate that to using horses, it will be like I received into horses, I used to be going alongside, I used to be studying, I received extra severe in 2018 and ran three 5ks. We may–we may translate that into, , I hit three completely different targets in using horses after which actually form of backed off. And why did I again off? Nicely, if I take a look at it as operating, I backed off as a result of I–I form of had achieved the purpose of operating the 5ks and–and didn’t actually have one other purpose. And that’s so simple as it’s. And I believe typically I discover individuals who received into horses, did some stuff, after which they only form of do the identical factor I did with the operating the place it simply form of is like, I don’t know, I don’t need to simply rinse and repeat and do the identical factor, however I don’t actually know what else to do, however I’m form of joyful, happy it’s working. That is the place I believe these three traits I used to be simply speaking about, the massive image and the place you at the moment are, that–that willpower, that feeling of willpower or one thing like that, like why would you even need to do it? Perhaps it’s not a factor for those who don’t really need to do it or–after which what the tiny little steps are. As a result of to me, the massive image was, I had initially began operating for health, for using. I imply, health for all times, however isn’t life using, so form of the identical factor? So health for using and–and by taking it up, it made me instantly consider the place I used to be at and up and thru operating the 5ks, I used to be decided that I used to be going to have the ability to full this 5–sofa to 5k app and do that and it was form of cool. After which I simply received to this base camp and I simply form of arrange a everlasting camp in that base camp the place I’d form of do it and form of not. And it wasn’t till the buddy was like, , you might do a 10k. And I used to be like, no, that’s loopy. But it surely wasn’t till I had a brand new large image after which I reevaluated towards that that I may then determine whether or not or not I actually wished to, which is then the place that “need to” goes to have to attach with that willpower, that “why” goes to have to attach there. After which I may begin to have a look at the little tiny steps. That’s why I’m saying these little tiny steps to me at all times point out like that subsequent layer. And the very first thing I did after I lastly accepted the massive image of like, I need to go forward and check out doing this. I need to intention for this 10k. I need to a minimum of step in and get began. And the willpower…very first thing I did was harm myself. The very first thing I did was overdo it and harm myself. After which that was a very fascinating second as a result of I’ve been there earlier than within the horse world the place I’ve carried out issues and didn’t have it work out the best way that I believed it will. And , that’s that’s a time for a rebuild. And so I purchased a ebook on operating type and I noticed that my operating type was what was hurting me. It additionally was making operating a 5k more durable as a result of with poor type, I used to be not very environment friendly and I used to be extra liable to threat of damage. And so then I noticed that I wanted to enhance my operating type. After which I noticed that I spend extra time strolling in every week than I do operating. Like standing up off the bed, strolling out to get espresso, strolling all the way down to the barn, strolling out to feed the horses, and my strolling type was worse than my operating type. So swiftly, I begin seeing all these particulars that regardless that I had been a runner on some stage, I hadn’t seen the main points as a result of it wasn’t till I set the larger purpose of operating the 10K, it wasn’t till I went to succeed in for that larger purpose that I noticed I used to be going to have to alter plenty of different issues to succeed in it. As a result of though the best way I used to be strolling and the best way I used to be operating had supported me for a 5K, they weren’t going to help me for a 10k. So then I began following the ebook and altering one factor at a time and altered coaching myself to–to consider various things. How I’m touchdown, how I’m shifting, how I’m respiratory, what my timing is, all these various things. And one of many hardest issues I did was I finished listening to podcasts or music whereas I ran and I began listening to my physique. Yeah, I finished listening to podcasts or music and began listening to my physique. The second half of that’s the half that’s the more durable one–began listening to my physique. And it was exhausting due to this–like, I felt discomfort. I felt disenchanted. I felt unsure about my type and the way I used to be operating. And since I used to be making an attempt to alter all of it, I felt awkward and I used to be signing up to do that 3 times every week. You already know, 30 to 45 minutes I’m going to deal with being uncomfortable and disenchanted and unsure and awkward. And yay, isn’t that enjoyable? Right here’s an much more fascinating reality, after I harm myself by overdoing it as a result of I didn’t know what I didn’t know and shopping for the ebook and dealing on altering my operating type it took me 4 months to get again to my baseline operating that I had been doing earlier than. Which means previous to my purpose of the 10k, I used to be capable of run a 5K. Then I promptly harm myself by overdoing it, heading for the 10k, after which I needed to again–I selected to again off and look into the main points, and it took me 4 months of adjusting my operating type and dealing persistently on it simply to get again to my baseline of operating the equal miles that I had been operating earlier than. And 4 months, whereas altering that and feeling all that felt like endlessly as a result of I’d already been there earlier than, it’s not like I’d by no means run two miles or three miles. So it was irritating. After which lastly, on the fifth month, lastly on the fifth month, I reached that tipping level. And for those who bear in mind Episode 5 of this podcast or for those who don’t, you may return to the start and take heed to Episode 5 as a result of it’s received some actually cool ideas in it as a result of what occurred to my operating is I went from unconsciously incompetent. That’s how I used to be operating that I used to be hurting myself and I used to be inefficient in my–my power, my motion, the whole lot. So I used to be unconsciously incompetent. I didn’t know what I didn’t know. I didn’t know what I used to be doing that was inefficient. After which after I began studying the ebook and began altering it, I turned consciously incompetent. That’s the place I spent a big portion of 4 months consciously figuring out that I used to be incompetent to stroll and run, which, whenever you’re 46 years outdated, is form of a breakthrough. Like, I don’t know methods to stroll. Okay, so accepting this after which shifting on after which lastly attending to the purpose the place I used to be consciously competent, I may keep centered. I may deal with my respiratory, deal with my arms, deal with how I’m shifting and my core and my legs the place I’m touchdown. I may deal with all of these things and I used to be consciously competent. And that’s after I began seeing the shift, as a result of again in then–then like in month 5, I used to be lastly again to the place I’d been operating earlier than. However swiftly it felt approach simpler as a result of I used to be far more environment friendly as a result of I used to be far more efficient with my type. After which in month six, I went from probably the most I’d ever run, , like a 5K. I’d carried out like one in a single month and each other month. In June in coaching for the 10k I ran, I ran 5 5ks simply in my coaching after which in July I ran seven 5ks in my coaching. After which in August, I ran one other seven plus. One of many different issues that occurred in that month was I ran 7.2 miles as a result of that was considered one of my lengthy runs for a problem. And I’ll inform you that one of many issues that I discovered in going from a 5K to a 10k is it’s an enormous psychological recreation as a result of operating for that lengthy is a–is a thoughts recreation as a lot as it’s a physique recreation, particularly after I lastly had gotten extra environment friendly. So this was really simpler operating now than it was after I was operating the 5ks with poor type earlier. After which in September, and I’m recording this in September, proper now, I’d have already run 5 5ks plus I ran my first official 10k. And on this month in September, I lastly have seen glimpses of the unconscious competence that comes whenever you’ve practiced for thus lengthy. It lastly begins to really feel such as you don’t have to consider it each single second.
Stacy Westfall: And I say all this as a result of I need to know what would you like so badly that you simply’re keen to rebuild your self fully to get it? My husband simply stated, I believe you’re healthier proper now than you ever have been. Do you agree? And I stated, I don’t know. Perhaps after I was in my 20s, possibly I used to be. Perhaps I used to be healthier now. I imply, I wasn’t making an attempt, however possibly I simply was as a result of I used to be, , 20. And he stated, Do you assume you might have run six miles whenever you’re in your 20s? And I stated, Nope. Wow, that’s bizarre. I’ll have a good time my birthday this coming weekend. I’ll flip 47 and I’m in higher form proper now than I most likely ever have been in my life. And I say this as a result of the most effective half for me is that I’m using higher due to it. My abilities on the highest of a horse using are higher due to what I’ve been doing, and it’s so fascinating as a result of I suppose I may have caught with my authentic title concerning the barely dissatisfied rider. As a result of in case you are barely dissatisfied and also you need to know for those who’re nonetheless on monitor, I believe you may double test your self by these three issues. Are you wanting on the large image and evaluating the place you’re proper now? Do you spend a good period of time all through your week in a sense of willpower or one thing comparable? As a result of that’s what I needed to name on after I was going on the market to run and feeling all these different issues. I wanted to really feel that willpower. After which the actually key one is that this: When somebody is providing you the subsequent steps or whenever you turn out to be conscious of the subsequent steps and also you begin seeing, oh my goodness, there’s a lot extra. I believed I understood this and now I see 5 extra little steps, 10 extra little steps. I’m not saying you may’t really feel a second of frustration, however I do need you to test in with how usually you’re feeling annoyed in that second or fascinated by the truth that there’s extra to continue learning. As a result of that, to me, is the tipping level. You’re allowed to really feel no matter you’re feeling. However for those who really feel that fascination creeping in you could be like, wow, there are 100 extra little steps proper there, and that’s the finest information ever as a result of I can do little steps even simpler than I can do nice large large leaps. Are you fascinated? Thanks for listening, and I’ll speak to you once more within the subsequent episode.

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